Towards the end of last year, I decided to try and live two words that I believe every aspiring leader should put at the forefront of their journey and those are being INTENTIONAL and AUTHENTIC about every part of my life. I must admit, this has not been a simple discipline to keep throughout this year but certainly not impossible.

Up until 2 years ago, I had been a sucker to pleasing other people first than being true to myself in the hope of being accepted or liked rather than being respected. As I have grown to know myself better, I believe finding your true authentic self is the key to gaining trust and respect from the people you lead and the peers with whom you seek acceptance. During this journey, I have discovered that authenticity doesn’t come easy especially when you have a lack of self-awareness.

And so I decided to embark on this self-awareness journey in the hope that if I am honest with myself, I can, in turn, be honest with others. They say that the hardest person to lead is yourself, simply because most of us don’t know ourselves quite well. We always make assumptions, we ignore our blind spots in the hope that they will simply disappear.

True and authentic leaders have high levels of self-awareness, they ask themselves the hard questions and they are very comfortable with who they are and will not try and lead like somebody else – They are their own authentic self. And so oftentimes, I found myself trying to put on a show for others as well as trying to fit in the expectations of others.

Some of the ways in which you can grow and be more authentic are summarized below:
1. Be values-driven – have values that drive your life and a clear vision of what you stand for. Don’t have circumstantial values, try and be the same no matter what the situation you find yourself in.

2. This brings me to the word that I truly have struggled with in this journey – consistency. Don’t just say the words, do the words. People can always read between the lines for people who are authentic and fake.

3. Ask yourself this question – Do I want to be LIKED or RESPECTED? I know from experience that being liked doesn’t get you far. When you are authentic, you always do the right thing and in most cases, get the respect you deserve. John C. Maxwell puts it this way – “The more responsibility you get as a leader, your desire to lead has to be stronger than your desire to be liked.”

4. Just be REAL – it’s as simple as that! Be real with people in everything.

The biggest takeaway I think from today should be to try and correlate your authenticity and the success or growth you are trying to achieve. You need to know that every change starts with you. And so if you want to change anything, you have to make sure that you’re changing yourself first – That’s the journey I have intentionally embarked on, it’s your turn now.